Part Seven: The Story Made in Heaven Starring: Freddie Mercury, ERM, Mr. S, & Friends... & Roger Meddows Taylor

Remember when ER exploded in an explodey explosion? If not you must read part 6.Anyways, she’s dead. Because she’s Brian’s kid, she went to visit Laura & Michael. On the way she saw the most grotesque sight ever! Mr. S in überdorky sandals and old-lady-librarian glasses and clownly clothes. She ran past him real quick-like.*at Michael’s*The 3 stooges’ dead kids were having a nice spot of tea. Suddenly Laura somehow fell and landed in a bucket of puppies. (At least the sun was out) Michael laughed so hard Bailey’s lava spewed forth from his nostrils. ER was scared so she hid in a heavenly toboggan warehouse. That didn’t last long, though, because Elvis found her and kicked her out (this was his home, after all). Then she went to IGA to buy stuff. Emily Ruth stuff. Stuff like milk, maple syrup, cochroaches.*back on Earth*Brian had successfully locked his wife away in a HUMUNGOUS chicken purse. (It looked like a chicken, it’s not made out of chicken.) He celebrated by a good night of drinking with Rufus.*Roger time now*Roger liked the taste of Mr. Noodles so much he bought a Mr. Noodles factory.*Roger time is over*Brian & Rufus decided to go ‘pick-up’ chicks. They failed miserably, though, because Brian is old, and Rufus looks like a fetus (x Matt Sparrow).Meanwhile the kid herd had started on ÜBERCREATION COMPANY. For lunch they ate a grand total of 821.6 ÜBERMUFFINS. They also for a call from Bob Geldof. He wanted them to build “THE ÜBERFOUNTAIN OF ÜBERYOUTH” in his yard. They immediately set off, eager to construct überness.*during all this action*John was busily creating a special gift for Brian. It was a pretty orange paper plate (that smelled like taco salad) on which he had written ERM—RIP. (If you don’t understand, read the previous parts of the story). When he gave this to Brian, Brian became angry (in a sad way) and threw it in the microwave. John felt offended, so he kicked Brian in the knee and ran away, sobbing uncontrollably.*Anyways, back in heaven*After eating all that Emily Ruth stuff, ER became sick and starting spewing muffins all over. She was tired of hanging out with Michael and Laura, so she went to visit Freddie. She found him with an acoustic guitar, but he was not very happy so he started yelling “This shitty guitar only knows three chords!” and tossed chucked it somewhere. She laughed, which caught Freddie’s attention. He got angry at her for barging in on him, so he set his guitar on fire and threw it at her head, then he shot a mirror at her from his mirror bazooka! Freddie found this all quite amusing and kept shooting mirrors at random people like Elvis, Queen Elizabeth, John Lennon & Roger’s father. But to Freddie’s surprise, Elvis ripped out a mini trampoline which failed at life and ripped, knocking Elvis over. Then amidst all the commotion, Queen Elizabeth picked up John Lennon and they had a wheelbarrow race with Roger’s dad and Heath Ledger. Heath screamed in delight :D! Roger’s dad just sat there... motionless. All of a sudden Mr. S appeared! But luckily Freddie still had his mirror bazooka so he shot Mr. S and sent Mr. S flying who then began to do the Mr. S twitch. Everyone was happy and Freddie had a tea party with Elvis and the Wheelbarrow Racers. Then Michael came and started kicking Mr. S who continued to twitch. Eventually Mr. S became angry, made a Bilbo Baggins evil expression, and vanished into a neon pink mist. (He’s done with this)*back on Earth*The herd had finished the ÜBERFOUNTAIN OF ÜBERYOUTH. Bob was happy. He gave them muffins, but they weren’t ÜBERMUFFINS, so the herd fed them to Eddie Murphy. Roger, John, and Brian came by to see the übercreation and Bob let them have some. They immediately turned from old-man Roger/John/Brian to 1982 Roger/John/Brian!Yay! They’re awesomer! Since they were happy they celebrated, Roger celebrated by drinking, John celebrated by taking the kid herd to the Efteling (a Dutch amusement park), and Brian celebrated by building another guitar. Everyone was happy... everyone but...*Freddie was sad because now he’d never get to see Roger/John/Brian again (unless they got hit by a vehicle or drowned or something. They just wouldn’t die of old age.) He was over his sadness in a moment though, and he had a party with John Lennon, Beethoven, Bach, the other dead Beatle (George Harrison), Princess Diana, Jim Morrison, & Dale Earnhardt. Soon he’d completely forgotten why he was sad.
Meanwhile, Michael, ER, & Laura began painting the clouds.
*whatever*John, Bob, Roger, Brian, Luke, Robert, Tigerlily, Rory, Rufus, Cameron, Felix, Lola, Joshua, Louisa & even Jimmy went out for supper at Costco! They had a great time.The End