Part too: The Ballad of Mr. Rufus & all his pals, who really like the ice creme from UBERICECREMECOMPANY and the milkshakes from there, too.
One day Rufus & Liv were hungry. Then they ate some food and they weren’t anymore. While all this crazyness was happening, Penny & Lenard were playing drinking games with Roger. Not. They were playing with some UBERFUN TOYS courtesy of uncle Felix (or should I say üncle Felix?) They did not die from playing with these toys. Then MK & Ashley Olsen who were ubersmall childs (but NOT babies) came in to play with them, but died because they are not uber enough. (They were ubersmall childs because they came across the UF of UY and drank from it—without permission!) Then Rufus came in, and dumped the Olsen’s at the edge of a lake. Liv was impressed by his courage and brought him to a Green Day concert.
*later*
Somebody in the crowd had suddenly decided they didn’t like Green Day at all, so they sent all their trained pigeon-monkeys to the stage. The pigeon-monkeys brutally killed the guys from Green Day and ate their corpses. Rufus was sad because the music had stopped, but was soon happy again when Liv whipped some peanut butter out of her purse. Then Rufus & Live began stuffin’ down peanut butter with rusty plastic spoons. They had fun. Lots of fun. Uber fun. Peanut-butter-eating fun. Their fun soon ended, as they discovered someone near them was allergic to nuts—deadly allergic. They soon found out it was someone they knew! It was Luke Deacon! Liv was ubersurprised, but Rufus couldn’t figure out why Luke was important so he went back to eating peanut butter. Liv didn’t really care about Rufus anymore, so she married Luke. Not. She just clubbed Luke out with her purse and took him to John & Ronnie’s hosue.
*at THE DEACON’S*
John & Ronnie were eating cheese on toast with green tea when Luke came in. They were so surprises, THEY ALMOST SPILLED THEIR TEA! Then John ran over and gave Luke a hugnormous nearly-bone-crushing hug (but not an awkward one). Then Liv went to find Rufus.
*later*
Rufus had not been where he was when Liv left, and now she couldn’t find him. She decided to look other places Rufus might go (like UBERICECREMECOMPANY, various bars/pubs, and Orange Julius). She didn’t find him in any of those places, and she gave up and went home. She was tired, so, she went to her (& Rufus’) bedroom. There she found Rufus! Unfortunately, Billie Joe Armstrong’s widow was there too. Liv freaked out (and realized Rufus was slowly turning into his father). She picked up that brick that Rufus tripped over in part 1 and hucked it with all her might at a very surprised (and slightly embarrassed) Rufus. Unfortunately she missed, and the brick smashed a monsterous hole in BJA’s widow’s skull. Liv was satisfied now that her ‘competition’ was gone, so she made Rufus remember why he was married to her. Rufus still felt slightly bad, so he thought he’d make it up to Liv by having more kids! Just kidding. He just bought her a nifty necklace worth £100. Liv said “Why thanks!” and took it. Then she ran off to someplace with a mirror (no more, no less) to try it on. Then Rufus went to but Queen Greatest Video Hits 2, because it’s the only DVD worth buying, but discovered his credit card was maxed out! Rufus was broke!
*What’s going on?!?*
Liv was UBERANGRY that Rufus had somehow spent all their money. They decided to try to find a way to get more money. Then they heard the doorbell ring. Then they answered the door. On their doorstep was Jervais Something-er-other. He was interested in buying UBERICECREMECOMPANY from Liv & Rufus. They did not agree to sell the company to him. This angered Jervais, so he got into his car, and ran over Ted. HE DID not DIE! They decided to sue Jervais for £13.7 billion! Now they were uberrichnormous! Unfortunately, Rufus suddenly became uberobsessed over Lord of the Rings and spent 12 billion cents on LotR stuff. Liv was happy, so she overdosed on Ritalin and died.
Just kidding.
*later*
Somebody in the crowd had suddenly decided they didn’t like Green Day at all, so they sent all their trained pigeon-monkeys to the stage. The pigeon-monkeys brutally killed the guys from Green Day and ate their corpses. Rufus was sad because the music had stopped, but was soon happy again when Liv whipped some peanut butter out of her purse. Then Rufus & Live began stuffin’ down peanut butter with rusty plastic spoons. They had fun. Lots of fun. Uber fun. Peanut-butter-eating fun. Their fun soon ended, as they discovered someone near them was allergic to nuts—deadly allergic. They soon found out it was someone they knew! It was Luke Deacon! Liv was ubersurprised, but Rufus couldn’t figure out why Luke was important so he went back to eating peanut butter. Liv didn’t really care about Rufus anymore, so she married Luke. Not. She just clubbed Luke out with her purse and took him to John & Ronnie’s hosue.
*at THE DEACON’S*
John & Ronnie were eating cheese on toast with green tea when Luke came in. They were so surprises, THEY ALMOST SPILLED THEIR TEA! Then John ran over and gave Luke a hugnormous nearly-bone-crushing hug (but not an awkward one). Then Liv went to find Rufus.
*later*
Rufus had not been where he was when Liv left, and now she couldn’t find him. She decided to look other places Rufus might go (like UBERICECREMECOMPANY, various bars/pubs, and Orange Julius). She didn’t find him in any of those places, and she gave up and went home. She was tired, so, she went to her (& Rufus’) bedroom. There she found Rufus! Unfortunately, Billie Joe Armstrong’s widow was there too. Liv freaked out (and realized Rufus was slowly turning into his father). She picked up that brick that Rufus tripped over in part 1 and hucked it with all her might at a very surprised (and slightly embarrassed) Rufus. Unfortunately she missed, and the brick smashed a monsterous hole in BJA’s widow’s skull. Liv was satisfied now that her ‘competition’ was gone, so she made Rufus remember why he was married to her. Rufus still felt slightly bad, so he thought he’d make it up to Liv by having more kids! Just kidding. He just bought her a nifty necklace worth £100. Liv said “Why thanks!” and took it. Then she ran off to someplace with a mirror (no more, no less) to try it on. Then Rufus went to but Queen Greatest Video Hits 2, because it’s the only DVD worth buying, but discovered his credit card was maxed out! Rufus was broke!
*What’s going on?!?*
Liv was UBERANGRY that Rufus had somehow spent all their money. They decided to try to find a way to get more money. Then they heard the doorbell ring. Then they answered the door. On their doorstep was Jervais Something-er-other. He was interested in buying UBERICECREMECOMPANY from Liv & Rufus. They did not agree to sell the company to him. This angered Jervais, so he got into his car, and ran over Ted. HE DID not DIE! They decided to sue Jervais for £13.7 billion! Now they were uberrichnormous! Unfortunately, Rufus suddenly became uberobsessed over Lord of the Rings and spent 12 billion cents on LotR stuff. Liv was happy, so she overdosed on Ritalin and died.
Just kidding.
